So, I have heard many different viewpoints on potty training. I would break down the whole process for you BUT there is no one way to do it due to the fact that every child is and will be different. I decided to instead give you some little brief side notes to help you when considering to and when potty training your children....
-If they are fighting you about it, do not force them! Now, this does not mean do not encourage them and try to help them get excited-especially when they are 4 and 5. At this point it may be more of a discipline issue.
-Do not go from diapers to underwear!!!!! This one gets me every time. Pull-ups are a stepping stone so they (1)they do not get used to going potty in their underwear (like diapers) (2) And at this point they are stil learning control. Going in their underwear may cause them to feel guilty and ashamed of themselves
IT IS NOT ALL ABOUT YOU! IT IS ABOUT THEM! GET OVER- "I'M TIRED OF BUYING DIAPERS" & WELCOME TO PARENTHOOD :) - I mean that in love
-Consistency is key, especially if they are in child care. Make sure to try to be as consistent as possible at home and try sticking to using the same methods that the center is using.
-Learning to have a BM on the potty almost always comes last. Do not stress it if this takes a little time.
-No, you do not need to give them physical rewards every time they go potty BUT encourage them. Give them words of affirmation. Come up with a song and dance. Make them proud of themselves and let them know that you are proud.
-Allow them to be independent in this. Let them pull down their own pull-up, pull their pants down, wash their hands, etc. Get them excited about doing things for themselves. This is a big kid step for both you and them. Can't expect them to want to be independent if you are always taking this away from them. Allow them to be confident in their abilties. Then, they will be confident in doing other things.
-Help them out by getting them the pull-ups that they can take off themselves (velcro sides) and pants that they can take off themselves. No onesies please (this for them becomes a hassle and they'll have trouble wanting to go). This goes for when they are in childcare as well-keep the consistency.
-Talk about using the potty when they wake up in the morning before dropping them off at school. Get them excited!
-Let them watch you go potty and ask "do you want to try going potty like mommy and daddy?" Helps when you let the parent of the same sex as the child show them. What child doesn't want to be like mommy and daddy.
-If they are still going pee pee on themselves while you are changing their diapers-they have not yet learned that bladder control. You can still take them to try potty but they are not ready. BUT If you notice your toddler, 2 year old, etc. not going pee pee as often in their diapers this can be great or not so great (either means they have a UTI, etc. OR means that they have learned to hold it and can be totally ready to use the potty!).
-Suggestion-putting a pull-up on at night or during naps is not a bad thing as long as you are checking to see if they are waking up dry. I'd give it about 2 weeks of a dry pull-up consistently and then try allowin them to sleep in their underwear. Help them out though-don't give them tons of liquids before they go off to sleep (you are asking for it fi you do)
-Rule of thumb! I know that everyone loves to look on google and look at research to see what it says and some parents even go to great lengths to do everything that "the research" says- EVERY CHILD IS DIFFERENT! Research can really get you into some trouble and cause unneccesary stress for yourself and your child.
Hope these tips help you in some form or fashion. But remember, every person eventually becomes potty trained so please do not place your stress on them. Stress in potty training on a child is the best way to bring down their self-esteem and leave them feeling ashamed and guilty. We are raising champions, not animals.
Here are some verses to help you along the way..Happy Training!!!!
-If they are fighting you about it, do not force them! Now, this does not mean do not encourage them and try to help them get excited-especially when they are 4 and 5. At this point it may be more of a discipline issue.
-Do not go from diapers to underwear!!!!! This one gets me every time. Pull-ups are a stepping stone so they (1)they do not get used to going potty in their underwear (like diapers) (2) And at this point they are stil learning control. Going in their underwear may cause them to feel guilty and ashamed of themselves
IT IS NOT ALL ABOUT YOU! IT IS ABOUT THEM! GET OVER- "I'M TIRED OF BUYING DIAPERS" & WELCOME TO PARENTHOOD :) - I mean that in love
-Consistency is key, especially if they are in child care. Make sure to try to be as consistent as possible at home and try sticking to using the same methods that the center is using.
-Learning to have a BM on the potty almost always comes last. Do not stress it if this takes a little time.
-No, you do not need to give them physical rewards every time they go potty BUT encourage them. Give them words of affirmation. Come up with a song and dance. Make them proud of themselves and let them know that you are proud.
-Allow them to be independent in this. Let them pull down their own pull-up, pull their pants down, wash their hands, etc. Get them excited about doing things for themselves. This is a big kid step for both you and them. Can't expect them to want to be independent if you are always taking this away from them. Allow them to be confident in their abilties. Then, they will be confident in doing other things.
-Help them out by getting them the pull-ups that they can take off themselves (velcro sides) and pants that they can take off themselves. No onesies please (this for them becomes a hassle and they'll have trouble wanting to go). This goes for when they are in childcare as well-keep the consistency.
-Talk about using the potty when they wake up in the morning before dropping them off at school. Get them excited!
-Let them watch you go potty and ask "do you want to try going potty like mommy and daddy?" Helps when you let the parent of the same sex as the child show them. What child doesn't want to be like mommy and daddy.
-If they are still going pee pee on themselves while you are changing their diapers-they have not yet learned that bladder control. You can still take them to try potty but they are not ready. BUT If you notice your toddler, 2 year old, etc. not going pee pee as often in their diapers this can be great or not so great (either means they have a UTI, etc. OR means that they have learned to hold it and can be totally ready to use the potty!).
-Suggestion-putting a pull-up on at night or during naps is not a bad thing as long as you are checking to see if they are waking up dry. I'd give it about 2 weeks of a dry pull-up consistently and then try allowin them to sleep in their underwear. Help them out though-don't give them tons of liquids before they go off to sleep (you are asking for it fi you do)
-Rule of thumb! I know that everyone loves to look on google and look at research to see what it says and some parents even go to great lengths to do everything that "the research" says- EVERY CHILD IS DIFFERENT! Research can really get you into some trouble and cause unneccesary stress for yourself and your child.
Hope these tips help you in some form or fashion. But remember, every person eventually becomes potty trained so please do not place your stress on them. Stress in potty training on a child is the best way to bring down their self-esteem and leave them feeling ashamed and guilty. We are raising champions, not animals.
Here are some verses to help you along the way..Happy Training!!!!
I agree with most of what you said here. It is so important not to be too hard on these kids or shame them during this learning process. But I am a strong believer in diapers to underwear. Diapers (and pullups) are made to pull moisture away from the body in order to protect it. Kids need to be able to feel the wetness to associate the outcome with the feeling in their body beforehand. When they can begin to understand that correlation they can better learn to get to the potty on time. If the child is consistently wetting the underwear and not improving then they probably aren't ready to potty train. Part of the parenting job that comes into play is using the tools we have available to help our kids learn how their body works and what the outcomes are. I do not advocate allowing the child to sit in wet underwear. When they wet, you change it and talk to them about what happened. But I think the most important thing is to be cognizant of YOUR child and his/her readiness or unreadiness. And to be ok if they aren't "ready" as soon as your friends kids or whomever. Every child IS different and that is wonderful so we need to pay attention and if they aren't ready to keep those undies dry, bag it and try again later :) And the money saved on diapers is just a perk ;)
ReplyDeleteAll great points! I like your take on going from diapers to underwear and will definitely consider that when potty training from home I guess the issue with it comes in a child care setting when you have a child going potty on themselves and it gets on the playground, the carpet, etc. and there are other children around. At that point it becomes a sanitation issue which is harmful to the other children in the classroom. And many parents will potty train way before their children are ready (specifically in the child care field).
ReplyDeleteI do however see the benefit in it if I was to potty train in my own home. I know my child's medical history and if it gets on our stuff so be it BUT as you said, it really depends on -"is this child ready to potty train?" That really is the big question.
Every child is different and their journey to potty training can take many different turns BUT it is not a time of frustration and stress but an opportunity to help build their confidence in themselves so that they can confidently take on many other difficult tasks.
Thanks for the comment!